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[Jul. 3rd, 2010|06:25 pm] |
Joseph Dawlish was a fifth year with a shiny prefects badge. And he liked the fact that he was a prefect. That meant that he could get away with things that he normally couldn't get away with. And that was perfectly fine. He smiled a bit as he sat in the Gryffindor common room next to his best mate Aislin, thinking of how lucky he'd been to meet her on the train first year.
His attention wavered as he glanced at Leeroy, who was doing something obscene to a fourth year, then rolled his eyes and looked back at Aislin. "So. Another year. What sort of fuckery shall we be getting up to this year, Ais?" He hummed thoughtfully. "We could get McGonagall. That saucy minx." |
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[Dec. 19th, 2009|07:27 pm] |
Brooms are brown and snitches are gold,
I love Aislin and will 'til I'm old.
She makes my heart flutter,
she melts me like butter.
And when she smiles I want no other. |
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[Dec. 7th, 2009|04:44 pm] |
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I want to buy a horse. A horse is amazing. |
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[Nov. 5th, 2009|05:52 pm] |
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I woke up with a stomach ache and was violently vomiting. Now all I want to do is lay in bed and eat soup. Who wants to bring me soup? |
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[Oct. 9th, 2009|01:40 am] |
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I'm single. |
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[Oct. 2nd, 2009|06:57 pm] |
Who wants to see all the junk in my trunk? Do it while I'm still drunk...
Hey. That rhymed. Rimed. Rimmed. How do you spell that word? |
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[Sep. 17th, 2009|07:27 pm] |
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That's right. Who rocked the heels? I rocked the heels. |
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[Sep. 16th, 2009|03:06 pm] |
Private to Aislin
I was wondering if you wanted to come home with me for winter hols. You don't have to and you have time to think about it, but... Well, I just want to know. |
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[Sep. 12th, 2009|05:14 pm] |
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I don't remember anything about yesterday, but something tells me that I don't want to either. |
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[Sep. 11th, 2009|12:03 pm] |
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Something is wrong... |
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[Sep. 9th, 2009|01:59 pm] |
Uh... Leroy?
I DEMAND YOU COME PLAY WITH MY BREASTS! |
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[Sep. 8th, 2009|04:49 pm] |
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I just got an erection in my skirt. |
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[Sep. 8th, 2009|03:27 pm] |
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I think I look brilliant in a skirt, thanks very much. I'm damn beautiful. |
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[Sep. 5th, 2009|03:07 pm] |
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Couldn't steal my underpants, could you girls? I'd have to own some for you to get your hands on them. |
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[Aug. 26th, 2009|08:55 pm] |
Girls are the epitome of evil. They use their lips and cute little ways of making all of us men want them. And when we finally want them, what do they do? They kiss us and then say it was a mistake. That we shouldn't be kissing them.
If there are any nice girls around who are willing to snog me senseless, step up to the plate. Hell, at this rate I'll accept any males as well. |
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[Aug. 24th, 2009|06:45 pm] |
A wife went in to see a therapist and said, "I've got a big problem doctor. Every time we're in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out this earsplitting yell."
"My dear," the shrink said, "that's completely natural. I don't see what the problem is."
"The problem," she complained, "is that it wakes me up." |
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